Dr. Marty Becker stands with his family in a cherished photograph, his late mother Virginia at the center. Virginia, a profound influence in his life, imparted a simple yet powerful mantra: “choose nice.” This piece of advice, like many parental guidances, didn’t fully resonate with Dr. Becker until his later years, echoing the universal truth that the wisdom of our elders often becomes clearer as we mature.
Dr. Becker’s journey through life has been rich with experiences, from his professional endeavors as a veterinarian to his personal trials and tribulations. He has traveled extensively, observing that in many cultures around the world, the counsel of elders is not only sought but revered. This contrasts sharply with the often youth-centric culture of North America, where the wisdom of the elderly can sometimes be overlooked.
The passing of his mother at 90 and his mother-in-law at 96 marked a poignant chapter in Dr. Becker’s life. They left behind not just memories but also tangible pieces of their lives, including collections of Hummels, Lladro figurines, and Roseville pottery. While sorting through these belongings, Dr. Becker embarked on a reflective journey, sifting through decades of accumulated possessions that spanned the meaningful to the mundane.
This process of sorting and reflecting was not just about deciding what to keep or discard but about uncovering hidden treasures that held profound personal value. Among these were typed biographies of his parents, revealing intimate details of their lives and thoughts that Dr. Becker had never known. These documents painted a fuller picture of his parents as individuals with dreams, fears, and loves, profoundly impacting his understanding and appreciation of them.
Perhaps the most touching discovery was a worn piece of paper found in his mother’s wallet, inscribed with the words “Choose Nice.” This simple message, carried by his mother throughout her life, served as a poignant reminder of her enduring wisdom and the guiding principle she lived by. It struck a chord with Dr. Becker, especially in a time when societal divisions seem stark and the discourse often harsh.
Dr. Becker’s reflections on his mother’s advice have prompted a broader contemplation of how we interact with the world. In an era where patience often runs thin and divisions grow deep, choosing to be nice can seem like a radical act. Yet, it’s a reminder of the power of kindness and understanding in navigating not only personal relationships but also broader societal interactions.
As Dr. Becker continues to write and share his insights, he advocates for a return to these fundamental values. His work with the Fear Free initiative, which aims to prevent and alleviate fear, anxiety, and stress in pets, is just one aspect of his commitment to promoting care and compassion in all areas of life.
In sharing his story and the lessons gleaned from his parents’ lives, Dr. Becker invites us to consider how we might also “choose nice” in our daily interactions. It’s a testament to the enduring impact of our elders’ wisdom and a call to foster a more understanding and compassionate world.
